Never Sniff a Gift Fish

 

By Patrick F. McManus

McManus was a humor writer for outdoor life, hunting and fishing magazines. His stories featured improbable predicaments and childhood tales and strange characters, including himself. Often hilarious and always amusing, reading his stories is trip, in more ways than one. 

The title story, Never Sniff a Gift Fish, features Pat's neighbor, Al Finley. While on a fishing trip with Pat and Pat's long time friend, Retch Sweeney, Finley tries to think up short epithets that feature sporting themes, among which is, of course, "Never sniff a gift fish." A few more are, "What the tourist terms a plague of insects, the fisherman calls a fine hatch."  "I have never met a fish I didn't like." "Even a fish stick once knew the glories of the deep."

List of the stories included:

• Blowing Smoke
• Poof—No Eyebrows!
• I Fish; Therefore, I Am
• Running on Empty
• The Cat and the Cat Burglar
• Salami on Rye and Hold the Wild Gobo
• Two-Man-Tent Fever
• Fish Poles, and Other Useful Terminology
• The Man Who Notices Things
• The Elk Trappers
• The Short Happy Life of Francis Cucumber
• The Arkansas Prank Hound
• Well, Excuuuuse Me!
• The Mountain Car
• The Christmas Hatchet
• The Night Grandma Shot Shorty
• The Kindest Cut of All
• The Bush Pilots
• Share and Share Alike
• Never Sniff a Gift Fish
• Backseats I Have Known
• Edgy Rider
• Strange Scenes and Eerie Events
• The Hunters' Workout Guide
• Temporary Measures
• The Fibricators
• The Family Camper's Dictionary
• The Big Match